The Mooshu MashUp
by Julesthejellyfish
Summary: When Chris WildFlame is kidnapped in Mooshu, his friends Ryan WaterGlen and Ashley WinterBreeze are left to save him. Will they succeed or will they run out of time? T for language and mature themes. Please read and respond :D
1. Chapter 1

**Well hello there people. This is my first Fan Fiction, so please don't harass me with details and little "**_**Oh actually, a seraph spell only does 335-395 damage. Get it right"**_** comments like that. Like a bridge, get over it. Oh also, just a head's up, Ryan WaterGlen (our protagonist) is a girl. Not a very common girls name but, whatever.**

"Use centaur and kill the pigs Ryan. Centaur!" said Ashley WinterBreeze, frustrated.

"I can't find it; can I use seraph?" I asked.

"No Ryan! For the last time, don't attack if it's not going to kill them! You'll just throw away your blades! I put that spirit blade on you and I will be very hurt if you waste it," shouted Chris WildFlame.

"Fine…" I muttered.

The ninja pig and his little piggy buddies presumed to kill me and my friends with a Humongofrog and send us back to the Jade Palace.

Great.

I could have killed it with my seraph, but no, I succumbed to peer-pressure. My friends and I have been farming in Tatakai Outpost in Mooshu for the past hour, with little to no luck.

Great.

"See? I told you I should have seraphed," I said to Ashley while I uprooted some cattails from the pond.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry 'bout that," she said apologetically while rubbing her arm.

"S'ok. Shit happens."

"Hey where'd Chris wander off to?" she said looking around.

"Oh, he went off to go sell the black lotus's we found to that guy by the amulet shop."

You see, my friends Chris, Ashley and I are reagent collectors. We travel all over the spiral collecting reagents, amulets, wands and so on and sell it to the Bazaar in Wizard City. Master Merchant Elik employed us to help keep his "stash" plentiful.

"Ok, I wanna go see what pets they have over by the spiral door, then I'll find Chris," Ashley said wondering off.

"Kay," I called over to her. I walked over to the steps of the Jade Palace and sat myself down heavily, pulled off my boots and poured out the dirt and rubble that was collecting in them. As soon as I pulled of my second shoe, I heard high pitched shrieking and shouting coming from behind the Great Buddha Statue.

"NOO! PUT ME DOWN, YOU SMELLY MONSTER! YOU KNOW, THIS JERKIN OF MINE IS VERY EXPENSIVE! I FARMED FOR AGES DAMMIT!"

Must be Chris. Chris is the supportive, sensitive one in our group (and gay one of course). He was always teased in Storm Training because of his sexual orientation. Chris and I met in by the robe vendor in WinterTusk. He told me that my boots were way too formal for my hat. We both met Ashley when we she was really low on health in Pegasus Place.

I quickly put my shoes on and sprinted over to where the noise was coming from.

That's when I saw the monster. It was this ridiculously tall and scrawny wraith. Its robes were tattered and they dragged along the ground while its face was covered by a hood that reached its chin. In its left hand was a scythe, spattered with blood and mud. Yeesh. In its right was Chris, screaming his incredibly high scream and flailing like a fish out of water. All the village people and vendors fled into stores and buildings and locked themselves in.

Ashley was whacking at the wraith's feet with her staff and wasn't doing much except for annoying it. The wraith kicked her away, so hard she fell unconscious. And with that, the wraith fled off to the Water Temple.

I ran over to Ashley's motionless body.

"Hello? Ashley? Wake up there honeybuns. We have to go and save Chris now," I said softly.

"Ash? Ash? ASHLEY WINTERBREEZE! WAKE UUUUUPPP! Ugh, screw this."

I stood up and stomped on her pinkie finger. She bolted up right.

"Jesus Christ! Ryan WaterGlen! What in hell was that?" she shouted, rubbing her stomped-on hand and her head at the same time. She's always been arrogant and over reactive. When we met in Wysteria, she had roughly 100 health left. Chris and I asked if we could join the battle between her and a wood goblin. She said she was fine and then she was killed by a fire wyvern. Chris, being a caring soul made me come back with him to check on Ashley. We all just clicked and became friends.

"You simply weren't waking up. I had to take drastic measures." I said, lifting her to her feet.

"Ouch. That hurt you know! Anyway, what happened after I blacked out?" Ashley asked. We walked over to the large walls of the inner courtyard and sat down facing the Jade Palace.

"Well, that scary ass wraith thing took Chris and his cashmere jerkin over to the water temple. We gotta do something."

And with that, we strategized.


	2. Chapter 2

"_I told you to ssstop talkinggg!" _murmured the wraith, exasperated.

Chris spoke up and said, "No! I will not take any directions for somebody with split ends and horrible posture! It shows that you have absolutely no pride in your appearance! You know, if you really want I could lend you my salon hair damage repair shampoo. It really works well-"

"_Zzzzip it! You're givvvving me a head ache." _

They stopped talking for a little bit until Chris couldn't restrain his curiosity any more.

"Mr. Evil Wraith, do you have a name? I hate to keep calling 'Mr. Evil Wraith'."

The wraith stopped in his tracks, wondering if he should give his real name or not. He decided to say the truth.

"_Call me….. Iccara."_

"That sounds kind of girly. Are you female by any chance?"

"_I could asssssk you the same quessstion there, smart one."_

Chris frowned and stopped questioning Iccara. He hated it when people made fun of his sexuality.

The wraith half-dragged half-tossed Chris on the path to the Cave of Solitude. Once there, through endless moaning from Chris, Iccara walked to the edge of the forest, and into his hidden underground lair.

"So is there any way we can find Chris?" Ashley inquired to Head Master Ambrose. Ashley and I sat on a plush, blue couch in his office. Master Ambrose was sitting behind his desk sorting papers and books.

"I'm afraid not. Unless you know what this wraith was called, there is little chance that you will find your friend. I'm sorry," he replied.

"Ok, then. Sorry to waste your time Master Ambrose," I said humbly. Ashley and I stood up and made opened up the door.

"Any time girls." He winked at us with his good eye.

Ashley and I exited the office, walked over to the pond and dipped our feet in. The Commons were quiet; only with a couple of lovers holding hands by Rainbow Bridge.

"Well that blows. No more Chris," Ashley whispered. She let out a small sniffle. "I'm gonna miss his gay remarks so much!" She then started full on sob-wailing and covered her face with her hands.

"Oh come on Ashley! You really believe that we can't ever find Chris? Merle doesn't know shit when it comes to the real world! He spends his entire life in that musty old office of his! We can find Chris no problem we just need to know where to look," I said confidently.

Ashley peeked out of her fingers.

"You really think so?" she asked through her snot bubbling.

"Hell yeah! And we're gonna start now!" I took one of her mucus covered hands and dragged her over to the library. "And we're going to start at the library."

I marched up to the door and swung it open.

"Harold, we need your help," I announced as I stood before the front desk. Ashley had stopped crying by now.

"Well, good morning to you too Ryan! Who's your friend here?" Harold Argleston questioned.

"Oh this is Ashley WinterBreeze, my buddy."

"Wait Ryan, why does this dog guy know your name?" Ashley asked me.

"Ashley? Don't you remember what I told you about my social life?" I whispered.

Before I met Ashley and Chris, I was the Ravenwood laughing stalk. The reason Ashley and Chris didn't know me before was because they had studied at the Pigswick Academy instead of Ravenwood. I was a very good student and did well in school, got good grades, but I had no friends. People called me names like "string-bean" and "hippie" and "unsocial butterfly" because I'm a theurgist. I took refuge in the library and escaped from the endless teasing. I became good friends with Harold, the librarian.

"Oh right. Sorry," she whispered. She gave me a quick pat on the back.

"So girlies, what are you looking for?" he asked in his heavy Marleybone-ian accent.

"We need info on wraiths. Specifically in Mooshu," I said.

"Girls, I thought you came to me with a challenge!" he said jokingly while walking over to the back wall which was lined with book shelves. His fingered skittered around on the spines of books before finally choosing two. He walked back over to the desk and set them down.

"There you go. Enjoy lovelies," Harold said and he resumed his work organizing treasure cards. Ashley and I moved to the back room and sat down on two bean bags. We each took a book and dived in, searching for who had taken Chris. At around the hour mark, Ashley found something.

"Hey, look!" she exclaimed. She pointed to a picture of a wraith that matched the appearance of the wraith that took Chris.

"This looks like the one we saw," I said.

"Yeah, exactly! Here it says, _'The wraith is the most common monster found in Mooshu along with the ninja pig. One of the more notoriously known wraiths all over the spiral is Heera, a wraith living in the shadows in Tatakai Outpost."_

"Damn! The bastard that got Chris went to the Water Temple, not Tatakai outpost," I said, exhausted from all the researching. "Back to uselessly flipping through books then."

"Ryan, shut up with your pessimistic comments would ya? I'm not done reading the caption! Now, listen. _'Heera is known for kidnapping young wizards and taking their magical knowledge through black magic. He is not the only wraith who does this in the spiral, but most call their home Zafaria. But Heera has a cousin who lives in the Cave of Solitude in Mooshu. He is pictured above. His name is Iccara."_

"Hey that fits! The Water Temple leads to the Cave of Solitude and the picture matches!" I exclaimed loudly. I jumped up and ran to Harold at the front desk.

"Harold, I've got that challenge that you wanted."


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok guys, so I have no idea how many people have read this, but if you have, please send me a message or review so I know if I need to change anything. Rock on!**

"What can I do for you sweet-cheeks?" Harold replied.

"Got any mounts that we could use?" I asked.

"A challenge? Ryan you're killing me! Of course I do! I can lend you guys my rhino, Muffin. She's out tied behind my house over by Zeke and Eloise. Just unhook the rope and pet behind her right ear and she'll love you forever. May I ask why you need her?"

"Oh we found out that Chris is in the Cave of Solitude with some creeper named Iccara. We have to get to him somehow. Thanks so much Harold!" I leaned across the desk and hugged his furry neck. He smelled like mold and baby powder.

"But when you come back promise you'll give me a challenge ok?" he said smiling.

"Why of course!" I said over my shoulder. I walked back to Ashley and found her sorting through her backpack.

"Where'd you run off to?" she said, standing up.

"I just got us our ride to the Cave of Solitude. I call it 'The Muffin Express'."

"Ryan, honestly, what the hell have you been smoking?" We walked out of the library arm in arm and waved our goodbyes and thanks to Harold. We headed over towards Harold's home and found Muffin behind it.

"Hello there Muffin!" I said, scratching behind her ears. She let out a whimper of happiness. "This is what I was talking about earlier; the Muffin Express?"

"Oh I get it. _Muffin_. Let's go. I call driving." Ashley said.

"Well, you can't drive when you don't know where we're going." I smirked. She scowled at me, crossed her arms and asked, "So where are we going then?"

"To Mooshu. I don't think that we should go to the Cave of Solitude right now. We don't know what we're gonna do there and we need to collect more information," I said. I pulled Muffin's rope off of the hook and hoisted myself up onto her. Ashley followed and jumped on behind me, grabbing my waist.

"Yip yip Muffin! Let's go!" I said sweetly. She wouldn't move. "Muffin, come on! Yip yip!" I squeezed my heels into her sides, patted her neck, I tried everything.

"Jesus! You stupid frigin rhino! Move dammit!" Ashley shouted. She took her staff and poked Muffin in the butt. Muffin lurched forward into the pond, soaking everybody.

"Smooth Ash. Real fucking smooth." Everybody knows that I hate swimming

"Shut up. We're not dead so I figure that can't be bad. Plus, you gotta tone down the swearing too. It's rude," she said.

"Calm the_ fuck_ down would ya? I'm not a nun!" I enunciated carefully and loudly.

She rolled her eyes and pulled herself back up onto Muffin. I followed, but we had switched places this time; she was driving.

"I heard that dog-guy-librarian-man talking about scratching behind her ears. I'll see if that works…" She leaned over Muffin's head and began rubbing Muffin's ears. Immediately, Muffin lurched forward and trotted out of the pond. We went to Ravenwood, and then through the Spiral Door to Mooshu. All through the trip, Muffin stopped to crap four times. It took us a while to get to our destination.

"Ok, so now what?" Ashley asked as we dismounted Muffin and tied her to a cherry blossom tree. The sky above us was cloudy and it was drizzling a little bit.

"I think that we should speak to the guy who runs this place. But I'm pretty sure there are some strict rules that need to be obeyed. I think we should ask somebody from around here." I said just as a reagent vendor shuffled past us. He had a tray with its strap around his neck. On his tray were cattails wrapped in melted amber; a delicacy in Mooshu. Yuck.

"Excuse me sir? Could you please tell us how we can speak to the emperor?" asked Ash in her sweetest voice.

"No work! Nobody go there! Bad man, BAD MAN!" screamed the vendor. He ran off to the pond around the Great Buddha and jumped in.

"Good God! Mooshu is filled with absolutely bat shit crazy people! They steal gay teenagers and jump into ponds! What the fuck is up with this place?" I said, yearning for Chris.

"Zip it Ryan! Who cares about vendors committing suicide in a pond? We need to save Chris! Now let's go see this damn emperor dude!" said Ashley, marching over to the Jade Palace steps.

"Woah, hold on. Did you just say 'damn'? I think that's a cause for a celebration!" I said mockingly.

"Shut up and let's save Chris." We marched up the stairs and knocked with the heavy dragon-shaped door-knocker. Shortly after, a brown-patched cow opened up the door.

"Hello. I've been expecting you two."

"Please…Please stop this…" Chris whimpered. Iccara's long, frail finger pushed against Chris forehead, in between his eye brows. "It hurts… A lot."

"_Oh sssshhhhut up weaklingggggg," said Iccara._

"No please!" said quietly. "I don't understand why you're doing this!"

"_It'ssss all that Merle'ssss fault. He said that I couldn't ssstudy there because I was different! He couldn't have a _wraith _in his preciousss Ravenwood! So I have resorrrrted to taking your magical knowledggggge. So shut up nowww."_

"Am I going to die? Because if I am, somebody needs to feed my firecat, Kenny, at my home! He deserves much more than a dead papa!"

"_Well, no. You won't die, but you'll be in a catatonic state for the rest of your life."_

Chris let out a small squeak. "How l-long do I ha-have?" He whimpered.

"_In human days, roughly five days left."_

Chris's skin paled three shades at least.

He passed out.


	4. Chapter 4

**Ok peoples. I only have one review and that's from my friend, of which I asked to read this FanFic. If you guys could pleeeeease let me know what you think, I would be so thankful. LOVE Y'ALL~Julesthejellyfish**

"Are you the Emperor of Mooshu?" Ashley asked tentatively.

"Yes. But for two such young wizards like yourselves, you may proceed to call me Yuki," said the Emperor. As I looked much closer, I say he has miniscule wrinkles enveloping his snout, eyelids and ears. Underneath his red silk kimono was a pair of grey rain boots. Considering this guy was the Emperor, he was pretty informal wearing outdoor boots. Interesting…

"Oh thanks Sensei Yuki! I'm Ashley and this is Ryan," she perked. She's so damn happy. All the fuckin' time.

"Hi there," I said with a fake smile. I didn't like this guy. Or trust him.

"Please come in." Sensei walked back into the palace and up the stairs. Ashley entered but I quickly pulled her back out.

"Hey, calm down would ya? We gotta go and talk to-" she started. I cupped my hand over her mouth and I whispered, "Shhh. I don't trust this guy. Watch your back." She nodded and we walked through the large red doors. Yuki was sitting on a blue embroidered cushion at the top of the stairs, pulling off his rain boots. Around us were samurai warriors. There was no way that we could possibly escape. Well shit.

"So girls. I received a message from your teacher Cyrus Drake this morning. He told me about this situation with your friend Chris," Yuki said calmly. He stood up and walked over to a large tea pot in the corner, turning his back to us. I nudged Ashley's wrist.

"_We never even talked to Drake, we're not even Myth students!" _Ashley mouthed urgently.

"_We gotta get the fuck outta here; something's not right," _I replied.

"Oh, yes. He's was taken this morning just beside the Buddha Statue," I said, mimicking his coolness. Suddenly, Ashley let out an ear-splitting yelp.

"Aaaah! Ryan, my stomach, my stomach… Oww my poor tummy…" she whimpered from the fetal position she had formed on the ground. She looked up at me, her face contorted in pain. Two samurai warriors moved swiftly to the front doors, blocking our only exit. I leaned down to Ashley. She gave me a quick wink and a devilish smile and returned to her pained face. Holy crap I thought she was shot or something!

"Honey, what happened?" I said loud and clearly, playing along with her scheme. Yuki rushed down the stairs and joined me in leaning over Ashley.

"Ashley, how many fingers am I holding up?" He raised a fingerless hoof in front of her.

"Uhhhh, three?" she asked, woozily.

"Hmm. Something bad has happened to Ashley. This is not normal," Yuki said firmly. No shit Sherlock!

"Oh, maybe it was all those MUFFINS I ate earlier," she said groggily, yet very loudly. I knew what she was doing.

"Hmm. Yes, I too have had this problem before. You know once I was travelling and teaching in Wyster-" Yuki was cut off by a deep roaring noise outside. Muffin. What a good rhino-girl! The guards by the door whipped around and opened the doors up to see what was causing the commotion. Congratulations guards, you've just made our escape a whole lot easier. Muffin came charging into the Jade Palace, hurdling through the guards, pushing all of them over. She came to a halt in front of us and snorted, bobbing her head. Yuki was on the ground, unconscious next to us.

"Good girl!" Ashley praised, rubbing behind Muffin's ears. She snorted again. We hopped up on Muffin with me at the front and tore out the Jade Palace. We could hear the samurai yelling and clanging their swords.

"Aw shit, where do we go? They'll just follow us everywhere we go!" I shouted over the wind.

"I'll port to my tree-house and it should port us all there," Ashley yelled back to me. "Ready?"

"All systems are a go!" I felt a warm tingling feeling inching its way up my legs, to my waist, my neck until I was fully enveloped in the fuzziness. My vision blackened.

"Well it's obviously not a good thing Iccara! Thanks for pointing out the obvious," Yuki said, frustrated. He paced back and forth, wall to wall in Iccara's underground lair. It was a small dark room with a large candelabrum in the corner. The ladder to the Cave of Solitude above was pressed against a wall.

"_I'm sorry my lorrrd. I do not realize the gravity of this situationnnnn."_ Iccara bowed deeply.

"Ugh, I should have killed those two brats a soon as they walked in those damn doors! I cannot have them running around Mooshu ruining my plans!" Yuki shouted. He stormed over the candelabra and threw it to the ground. He sauntered over to a lit candle that had rolled away and picked it up. He turned and glared deviously at Iccara.

"_My lord, Ss-s-sensei, please. Don't do that to me. You know I ca-can't stand the fla-a-me," _Iccara stuttered. He backed up into a wall. _"Please, my l-lord!" _he urged. By now, Yuki was standing in front Iccara with the candle flickering.

"Where's the boy?" Yuki said.

"_My lord, Sensei, plea-"_

"No!" Yuki lurched forward and jabbed the candle into Iccara's hand. Yuki used his free hand to hold down his wrist. Iccara let out a cry that only heck-hounds could hear. "I won't stop until I receive the required information!"

"_Aaaaah… alright my l-lord, the boy is hi-hi-hidden under the wa-waterfall, reco-covering from our last extraction se-session…" _Icarra mumbled weakly. He tumbled to the ground, unconscious, possibly even dead. Yuki didn't bother to check. He walked slowly out of the room, and while climbing the ladder, he muttered, "You've served your purpose."


End file.
